Shoot the Tiger!

The year of the Tiger will soon be history. For a while at least. And a hellish Tiger year it has been, ending with the death of my husband on December 11, 2010. The year of the Rabbit promises to be tamer and calmer and more prosperous. Let's hope so.

Forever Fishing
and on Eternal Patrol

 (USS Cusk and (USS Wahoo)

I finished the draft of Jane at the end of November and was starting revisions in December but didn't get far. My beloved friend and spouse of 44 years died of an infection in his heart five days after entering the hospital with just a fever and a cough. He was End Stage Renal Failure to begin with, and for this past year he'd had more downs than ups. I knew the day was coming but I hadn't figured it to be so soon. It hadn't been quite two years after starting dialysis in March '09.

His funeral was held December 16, 2010, and he was buried with full military honors at the Willamette National Cemetery in Portland. I guess that means I will be buried there also--some day. Hopefully, a long someday away.

Two of my daughters were able to make it here, from the snowy Midwest, the night before he died and were able to spend some good quality time with him. Family and friends were there the next day when he was taken off the respirator for good. Within an hour and a half he had passed. Homeward bound, surrounded by kinfolk and friends of all ages.

My daughters are helping me sort and clean and even have a bit of Christmas. It was just yesterday that we decided the Christmas tree HAD to go up. And it did, and it's pretty, and I'm sure my dearest is happy that we did that, mostly for him. He loved Thanksgiving and Christmas. He made it through Thanksgiving but not Christmas. My girls will leave for their homes soon and I'll start my new life. Hopefully, the transition will be easy. Burst of sadness mixed with the joy of remembrance of the good times, often sneak up on me and I have to grab the tissue box. But overall, for now anyway, I am doing well enough. It will be another story, I'm sure, once I'm alone. No matter how I'll be affected by widowhood, I will be returning to writing with vigorous ambition.

But for now, this is Christmas Day. Spirit of dad, Christmas tree, turkey and dressing, and pumpkin pie. Later, perhaps we'll go to the park to feed the birds.


Merry Christmas.